Shadow Partners: The Vampire and The Donor
Updated: May 7, 2019
Shadow partners validate a limiting cycle that exists beneath the scope of awareness:
Criticizing to distract from tender hearts.
Bashing and shaming to depress great dreams.
Twisting and turning to avoid deep truths.
Entwining and desiring to satiate real intimacy.
Vampires drink their partners energy to sustain and motivate. What rests beneath this need to feed are gaps where their past was possessed by a power convinced to be greater than their own. They internalized this influence as their own power, subconsciously attracting partners who they can fill up on.
Donors donate their energy to their partners. They sustain themselves in helping their partner thrive...their offering gives them purpose. What exists under this need to submit are gaps where their past slipped away, was lost or stolen by a power convinced to be greater than their own. They internalized this influence in giving their power away, subconsciously attracting partners who they can continue serving from their personal well.
Notice an imbalance here? Quite dangerous to the psyche. And for a bit of hope, if you find yourself fitting in one of these descriptions, learning that shadow partners are a reflection of imbalanced power can shed some light. It is a subconscious contract to feed off of or serve from a depleted source. It is a personal purgatory. But it’s not eternity.
What ends this cycle?
Consciousness. Embodying the Sacred Self. Soul retrieval. Extracation. A path of mindful awareness. Practicing baby steps. Baby steps. Baby steps. Day by day. Finding natural remedies, nature, positive friends and family, people, places and activities that don’t shame, blame, or add to the limitations, but rather hold space, compassion and who invite you back into your sacred self!
It is a recovery.
I would love to hear from you. Have you experienced being the vampire or the donor? Have you witnessed loved ones in these roles? What are your processes around healing these gaps?
I have been in it and have come to learn that these are just our greatest fears lurking around until we are ready to bring them to light. Sometimes our experiences are more complex and threatening. We need to literally be saved and physically/psychologucally supported back to health. There often is deep trauma and illness as a result. But it is not the end result!
If you are in an abusive relationship please seek help! Your community wants to provide you with the right care www.thehotline.org
The path of healing is a recovery and maintenance that we each have the power to claim. Every. Day.
Sophia Brody, MA
I spent my MFT training helping mothers in addiction recovery. Recovery for most boiled down to shedding the cycle of shadow partners from their new sober living.
As a life coach I focus on helping clients track their old patterns, to dissolve their attachments and to shift into creating a world to reflect what their hearts deserve; love and happiness. My course, Dissolving the Walls of Limitation is a wonderful entry to this process. It is a deep dive to creating this shift. Learn more/book a session https://www.transpersonalmuse.com/book-online